Showing My Thrifty Side

In December I made an impromptu trip to Goodwill. Every now and then I find a good or even great deal. That day I found a great deal. I've been looking for a furniture piece to place at the end of my bed. Low and behold, there it was, for only $10.

The pattern is lovely. As you can see the fabric is worn on the seat and in desperate need of cleaning. Even then, the upholstery may still likely be stained in a few places. In that event, I will make a slip cover for it. I've been doing a bit of research and believe that I can make one that is true to the lovely lines and curves of the piece. I'm VERY pleased with my find.

A Turn for the Better

For the past several months my weekends have only been quasi productive. However today was a bit of a change. Not only did I awaken at a reasonable time but I started my taxes last night and finished them this morning. By noon they were filed. I did return to my lazy ways for a bit this afternoon, but by evening I managed to do some tidying up around the house. I also managed to work on a project.

A few weeks ago I went to Goodwill Industries (one of my favorite stores) and found some lovely wall paper. It was only one roll but it was too beautiful to pass up and at only $1.99 it felt like a steal!




Luckily an idea for its use came to me right away. I have a lovely dresser/wardrobe for which this elegant paper is just right. I'm thrilled with how it turned out. The photo below was taken while I was confirming the fit before using that piece as a template to cut out the other pieces for the remaining drawers. When I placed in all the pieces today, I used low tack adhesive spray to secure the liner to the bottom of the drawer. The effect is quite lovely and the paper sets much more smoothly than in the photo below.



That which we elect to surround ourselves with becomes the museum of our soul and the archive of our experiences. - Thomas Jefferson

It is so true. When we surround ourselves with items that speak to our soul, our home becomes alive and we see joy everywhere. Even the little things like my new drawer liner make me feel luxurious and cared for and it only took $2 and a little bit of effort.

The Word

There was a number of times that I wanted to post something the past several days, but chose to hang out with my kid instead. It's been so rare the past year that I had time to hang with her without the pulls of either her school work, drama with her dad, or my work. This past week we had none of those and it was incredibly enjoyable to be together watching murder mysteries (she's becoming a fan too) and doing little things around the house, oh, and a spot of shopping before the new year. There's no better luxury for less. Alas all good things come to an end. Tomorrow she returns to school and I return to the office.

I've had the opportunity to consider my intentions for this month as well as what I want this year to become. Looking back I can see where I have successfully implemented desirable lifestyle changes that not only made me healthier, but they made me happier. Over the past couple years I've unfortunately moved away from those changes, but I am getting back to them. The past five years has provided me with a smorgasbord of experiences to draw on as far as what works for me and what doesn't. So here I go, or rather, here I am.

Christine Kane in her blog recommended a year or two ago to select a word that reflects our desires. My word for 2010 is EMBODIMENT. To me embodiment means living a life that reflects my values. I have spent past years saying what I wanted, but not living what I wanted, particularly this past year. It's now time for me to live as I know I can and to embody my values first and foremost for my well-being, and secondly to be the role model I want to be for my daughter.

January Intentions
1. 1 thing in - 1 thing out. With the exception of grocery items, birthdays and Christmas, for anything new that comes into our home, something of comparable use/space must leave our home whether through donation, gifting, selling, etc.
2. No book buying during this month. I've got oodles to read already.
3. At least 10 min yoga per day for 30 days.
4. Cook at home from scratch 3 times per week.
5. Limit refined sugar to once per week.
6. Review finances every week (e.g. record and pay bills).

Have You Visited Your Library Lately?

I love books! I would buy books (plural) weekly if I could. I know this is contrary to the de-cluttering philosophy that I aspire to live by but I cannot deny my authentic self, a bibliophile. Having a home filled with books that I love is a true luxury to me. I’m not a fan of the Kindle or its equivalents in the digital world. I like the weight of books, their smell, their feel, underlining text, making notes in the margins. Because I cannot finance the lifestyle to which I could so easily become accustom, I am a strong advocate of supporting and using the local library. I am able to read books and watch movies at no cost to me (excepting my taxes and the occasional charitable donation). However my favorite aspect of the Library is their quarterly sales, a combination of donated articles and discarded library holdings.

By lucky accident I came upon their Holiday Book Sale quite unexpectedly. Fortunately I had a whole $6 cash on me which meant I could shop! I’m a sucker for used books. Like with garage/yard sales and visits to Goodwill and other salvage stores, I love finding a great deal and that includes library sales. This time I bought 5 books. The books were $1 each, except for one book priced at $2. So what did I find?


The $2 book is Toujours Provence by Peter Mayle. I've no clue why they listed it at twice the price of the other books, but clearly I was willing to pay it. I suppose I should read the prequel first.


Another book is At Home Abroad French: Practical Phrases for Conversation by Helen and Nigel Harrison. I am often searching the internet for French phrases so I thought this would be a perfect addition to my home reference section.


Next is The Ten Habits of Naturally Slim People: And How to Make Them Part of Your Life by Jill H. Podjasek. I purchased this one due to its table of contents. Habit-wise it very much resembles Mireille Guiliano's French Women Don't Get Fat but appears to go into much greater detail. I figured it was worth the $1 since I do have some weight to lose and given the stressors which continue to plague me and decimate my discipline, I can use some extra assistance in this area.

I consider this next book to be the real gem of my Saturday morning booty (when I write "booty" think pirate treasure chest, not back end asset). The New Diary by Tristine Rainer. I have heard nothing but good things about this classic book on journal writing and it has been on my Amazon wishlist for well over a year, perhaps longer. It is the original 1978 version. There was a new version published in 2004 that contains a new introduction, but pretty much everything else is the same. Anaïs Nin wrote the preface to this book just before her death in January 1977.



The final book is English Country Gardens by Ethne Clarke & Clay Perry. I was attracted to this book by the numerous photographs providing lots of eye candy plus the chapters are organized around what I presume are the English growing seasons, Early Summer, Midsummer, and Late Summer. Each season focuses on 3-6 counties. Overall it is what I would term a lite-gardening book, but it looked fun and I found the photos and writing, what there is of it, inspiring.


After returning home with my new lovely new editions, I was skimming the garden book again and discovered a little stowaway. A pamphlet published by Family Circle titled Houseplants: A Guide to the 50 Best for Gift-Giving and Decorating by Jacqueline Heriteau. BONUS!!!! What a lucky girl I am. It's fully illustrated and divided into chapters discussing best plants for kitchen, bathroom, office. This little bonus gives loads of info for such a tiny pamphlet. I couldn't be happier with my take.

Do you take advantage of your local libraries? Are you as crazy about books as I am? Do great deals (of the $5 or less variety) make your day like they make mine? Do you have more books in your home than you can stack on your bookshelves?

Oh, I guess I'm out of time. My dog just hunted me down for the third time tonight indicating it's bedtime and it's time for me to go to bed so she can as well. She's very fastidious about our bedtime and I've stayed up far too late tonight in her opinion. So I will end this with a photo I took of her earlier this evening when she was enjoying a nap in the family room. Her bed in my bedroom is much more cozy than this one in the family room.

Gifts to Give or Receive

Now that we’re in December my mind is on gift giving. So I thought I would list some favs that I giving (not much, but what the hay). A bit of a disclaimer here, my family has a long tradition of giving several gifts for the holidays, the majority of which are cheap (I’m talking quality here). When it comes to gift giving, I try to get good deals, but because there is only my daughter, mom and sister (and her fiancé) I tend to buy fewer gifts of higher quality. And with my mom, I particularly get her items that are more indulgent because for years she has lived on an income well below this country’s poverty level, had sacrificed so much for my sister and myself, and is very reticent to splurge on herself.


Photo courtesy of HearthSong

For my daughter this year it’s dollhouse furniture. A couple years ago I splurged and got her a proper doll house from HearthSong catalogue. Luckily she still plays with it. This year she has asked for more furniture, apparently the children are tired of sleeping on the floor. So I ordered her furniture for the children’s bedroom as well as the kitchen. I like HearthSong products because they are generally well-crafted, imaginative and educational.


Photo courtesy of campmor.com

This item is for my mother, sister, and myself. We all LOVE these wool socks by Columbia. So toasty warm during the cold months we endure here in the Great Lakes region. These are becoming harder and harder for me to find and I fear one day I’m going to have to find a replacement.


~Satine~ Inspired by Moulin Rouge. Photo courtesy of a la Parisienne

This is for my mother who loves jewelry, particularly pins and brooches. I must thank Stephanie at Bonjour Madame for letting me in on this little secret. Ok, it’s not a secret, but it was news to me. Mandy at a la Parisienne has an etsy shop where she is making and selling the most lovely flower brooches. She even has created a couple designs based on couture collections. The photo is of the one I purchased for my mom. I’m anxiously awaiting its arrival as I hear from Stephanie it is even more gorgeous in person than it is on the webpage.


Photo courtesy of Athleta

I confess, I was originally looking at these winter pants for myself. I spend a good amount of time walking my dog and decided it’s high time I get something warm for the frosty weather, especially for 6am and 9pm walks. I found these pants at Athleta's website. Based on the reviews, I ordered two pairs in different sizes. It turns out the smaller of the two fit me perfectly, so rather than return the second pair, I’m planning to give them to my mother who, like me, is chronically cold, even during the warmer months.


Photo courtesy of love, taza

Now for a dreamy unrequited item. Check out these headbands by Naomi at love, taza. They are spectacular.

What are your favorite gifts to give? What would you like to receive? Do tell!

Adventures in Lingerie Part II: An Evolving Culture - Matching Bras and Panties

I come from very pragmatic people of the Midwestern United States. My family came from a long line of farmers, laborers and hard workers. I grew up mirroring what I saw when it came to lingerie, basic bra and cotton briefs. Let me define “briefs”. We’re talking “granny panties”. Not bikini panties, not hipsters, in fact, we don’t even call them panties…they are underwear, plain and simple. I suppose one could say that I was introduced to matching bras and panties from an early age, as they were always white. I do vaguely remember whilst in early childhood having matching underwear and tanks, thanks to Granimals (which I still love). When I was age 9 or 10, I received my first bra. It was lacy, I think it was pink, and was technically a training bra or what is now known as a “bralette”, and it came with matching underwear…, excuse me, …panties. The matching set was a complete fluke because that was the last time I remember having matching lingerie. Oh, and we never used the term lingerie either. It’s all underwear. Fast forward 30 yrs. My first adult set of matching lingerie.

How did I get there? No, it wasn’t my first boyfriend. It certainly wasn’t my wedding night or at any point during my marriage. Nor was it the short-lived romance with my post-divorce boyfriend, now long over. The journey begins the summer of my 40th year. As I wrote before, I wanted to experience pretty under-things as a way to feel good about myself and enjoy myself as I am now. The impetus for diving into the world of silky, lacy and slinky is all due to the desire for self pleasure, luxury.

Once I managed to find some lovely bras, I was still without their lower counterparts. The store where I purchased the bras didn’t have matching panties. So started my search for panties that make me feel as lovely and sensual as did the bras. That search, is still somewhat ongoing and will make for a future installment. Oh dearie me yes, the lingerie posts are far from over. Due to my tutelage at the Intimacy store, I was able to select a lovely bra with a matching panty from the Macy’s sales rack. The Lunaire Charlston bra and panty. I obtained both for a substantial discount. In this case definitely luxury for less. I’ve had difficulty with bikini panties not fitting me well, but these are cut for a higher fit and work quite nicely and most importantly, stay in place. And the bra fits as well as any others I currently own and wear.



The Lunaire Charlston bra and panty. Photo courtesy of Macys.com.

I wonder, do others feel differently? I mean, do you feel especially good about yourselves whilst wearing pretty lingerie? Or am I particularly affected? Perhaps eventually the novelty will wear off but for now, I’m still enjoying myself. In fact, I was wearing this set when I had my car crash last week. No, my last thoughts before impact were not about my lingerie nor was it my lingerie that caused the crash (I was fully clothed at the time). While I was imbibing with the helpful physician in the bar later that evening I remembered an old wives tale about wearing clean underwear in case you ever end up in a hospital. I thought to myself that not only are they clean, they’re spectacular!

Recovery

After waiting around Nashville for a rental car to become available, I finally made it home Wednesday night. Arrived in town after 6 hours on the road and drove directly to urgent care. I still had the headache from when the accident occurred and although I was pretty certain it was sinus/ear related and exacerbated by the accident rather than stemming from it, I wanted to get it checked out so I could enjoy a good night’s sleep for the first time in days. After an exam the physician agreed with me that I had a sinus/ear infection and no neurological deficits. I didn’t get my knee checked out but figure it will either resolve or I’ll get it checked out later. I ended the day crawling into bed between my two favorite girls, my daughter (who wanted to sleep in my bed and how could I refuse) and my dog, Faith, asleep on the floor in her own bed.

The next morning I was quickly reminded that life moves on, everyone has their challenges, and how life frequently moves us from one challenge to another. I, however, took a break by staying home for work and resting. After the stressors of the events of the accident and getting home, I found myself lacking motivation and generally feeling numb. These feelings, or lack of feelings, continued into yesterday. In fact I went to bed Friday night at 8:30 pm and didn’t awaken until 10 am Saturday. Sleeping that long is something I have only very rarely done, but I must admit, I felt very indulged. My dog, who is a saint, was kind enough to let me sleep the entire time.

Finally Saturday I found myself returning to normal. I engaged in some yard work, cleaning a few windows (amazing how luxurious it feels to have some clean windows), general house tidying and walking Faith out in the sunshine. Showing yet again you don’t have to spend money to make yourself feel good and well-cared for.

Thankful Doesn't Seem Strong Enough

My head hurts. My shoulders and neck ache. My knee is sore. I'm bruised and tired and a little anxious. Above is a photo of my car, or at least what's left of it. It will likely be totaled out by the insurance company given it's missing the front half of the engine. Yesterday around 5:30 pm I was in my first car accident. Given my age I'm sure the fact it was my first accident makes me quite lucky. The fact that I walked away from it without serious injury makes me extremely lucky. This is what can happen to any of us. Unexpected stopped traffic after a blind curve on an interstate.

Thanks to the kind man from the crash site who drove me back to my hotel. He went well beyond the call of duty.

And thanks to Bob who helped me to decompress following the accident. Once back here at the hotel, I crossed paths with Bob, an MD who was a presenter at one of my conference sessions. We chatted and I mentioned I couldn't leave because I had just been in an accident and no longer have a car. He was very sweet and concerned for my well-being. He insisted on getting me liquored up since the only other thing he knew to do was to take a C-spine film and there were no X-Ray machines readily available, so we opted for some wine followed up with a good amount of scotch. We toasted my being alive and well. He helped me to forget my woes and we had a lovely visit. I owe him a debt of gratitude.

A day later I have a plan in place to get myself home. I had hoped to be home by today, but the entire city is sold out of rental cars until late tomorrow. So hopefully I'll get to go home then. I love and miss my car; I'm distressed to see it go. I'm worried that I can't afford to replace it. But aside from practical details, I'm profoundly grateful to be here. I know that I it could have been so much worse. The other two individuals involved also walked away unhurt.

Just in time for Thanksgiving the Universe gave me a reminder that things can be replaced, but the people and loved ones in our lives are irreplaceable, whether family, friends, good Samaritans or our loving animal friends.

Adventures in Lingerie Part I: A Beautiful Comfortable Well-Fitting Bra – Reality or Urban Legend?

The Kensington Bra by Prima Donna. Photo Courtesy of Bare Necessities. I don't own this bra, but I wish I did. Truly a work of art.

Since I began wearing bras in the 5th or 6th grade, I have consistently felt annoyed with them. Like many women, I have long had a difficult relationship with bras. Frequently uncomfortable and viewed as a necessary evil, I always felt that my body was somehow wrong because all those cute bras at the department store never seemed to fit me whether I was slim or heavy and I loathed reaching for the Playtex bra box as was the standard in my childhood home. During this past summer, frustrated with a recent weight gain resulting from a year of tremendous stress, I was tired of putting off my interests and desires until I “lost the weight”. I wanted to like my body now, in the present, as it was and is, regardless of the scale or the number on my clothing tags. Although I was in the proper bra size by all available calculations, I couldn’t get the darn things to fit right without spillage, straps falling down or the front center section sitting off my body by nearly half an inch or more. FRUSTRATION!!!!

Around the same time I was reading Entre Nous about how French women are very particular about their lingerie and how important it is that they wear beautiful high-quality pieces. According to the book (and other sources) a woman’s foundation garments are just as important as their outerwear. I wanted that for myself too…a life of quality, a few fine pieces rather than lots of crap. My daughter and I are fans of What Not to Wear and How to Look Good Naked. From those programs I learned more about proper bra fit. The latter program introduced me to a little store called Intimacy where there are bra-fitters extraordinaire and, according to the program, miracles occur. I so terribly wanted to be one of those miracles. I found one of their stores in Chicago merely two hours from my home. I scheduled an appointment for a fitting at Intimacy’s Chicago store thinking my 10 year old would find it interesting too. She had her first taste of a training bra some time ago and after the novelty wore off, 3-4 days, she discovered what so many of us have experienced, they are uncomfortable. Luckily for her she’s not yet developed so no support is needed in that area of her life. Though willing to wait for me, she opted out of my exciting journey content to listen to her iPod instead.

While my daughter entertained herself, I was whisked into a dressing room where a fitter asked about the current bra I was wearing, the size, the size shirts I wore, special needs, favored styles, etc. Then she left me to quickly grab some bras. By a process of elimination and her constant guidance, I learned how to evaluate fit and quality, make adjustments, proper bra care and wearing. Did you know that you should never wear the same bra for 2 consecutive days? The bra needs to rest a day after wearing it to allow the elastic to shrink back into its proper shape. I also learned that when worn properly and cared for properly, a bra’s lifetime expectation is only around 6 months (though I’m not certain, I hope that estimate is based on at least every other day wearing). A good quality seamed lace bra will generally last longer than other types of bras as the lace is quite strong. Another tip is to position one's nipple directly behind the seam when wearing a seamed bra. This will reduce the appearance of the dreaded "head lights" phenomenon. To experience your own bra education, I strongly urge you to visit Intimacy’s website. I feel fortunate to have had the opportunity to work with their fitter in their store, whose name escapes me. It was a lovely and educational experience. I learned quickly that my body was fine just as it is. The reasons bras had not fit properly in the past was because they weren’t the right bra for me or they were improperly adjusted. Some bras have a deeper cup than others even if they are the same size.

I managed to come up with a lovely bra wardrobe. I bought one athletic bra, because I do a good amount of walking and support is a necessity. I choose a Freya athletic bra and I can say without a doubt, multiple days of consecutive wear or not, my girls aren’t going anywhere in this device. Funnily enough, it’s pretty comfy. It looks a wee bit bullet-bra-ish, but if it helps to preserve my girls for another 10 years, then I’m all for it.

The four other bras I chose are more elegant and downright beautiful. Did I mention functional too?


Chantelle Africa demi bra in Ebony. Photo courtesy of Nordstrom.com. For when the occasion calls for décolletage.



Chantelle Legende T-shirt bra. Photo courtesy of HerRoom.com Fabulous T-shirt bra




Chantelle Legende Full Figure bra. Photo courtesy of HerRoom.com.
Makes me want to sing "I feel pretty, I feel pretty, I feel pretty and witty and gay...


















And now the Pièce de résistance:


The seamless Melody bra by Empreinte. Photo courtesy of BiggerBras.com. This is my overall favorite. I'm not even certain why. I got it in a lovely ivory color and although all of the other bras fit me very, very well, this one fits me like a glove....and I NEVER thought I'd say that about a bra. Love it!

Now that I have the know-how, and the bras, I feel confident and indulged. Yes, it was a splurge, a big splurge. But at that point I’d done nothing to celebrate my turning 40 this past spring. No party, no present, no dinner out, and I’d not had a proper vacation in two years. So I splurged. I think my bra wardrobe is complete except for one piece, a good strapless bra. However that is for another installment. This is, after all, Part I of the adventures.

Once home, I modeled them for my best friend, then her mom when she stopped by in the midst of my show. They were both quite impressed. My friend even wondered when she could go for her own fitting.

I think the luxurious aspect of this post is obvious. But what about the less part? How does paying the money for a good quality bra save you money? First of all you quit spending money looking for the bra that you hope will fit, unlike all of your other bras. With a proper bra wardrobe, you have what you need to fit most if not all of your bra needs. With a proper fitting quality bra, your clothes fit BETTER! Hence you may not feel the need to continue shopping for clothes that fit better to make you look better. Your foundation garment now does that for you. I’ve heard it said that a properly fitted bra along with good posture makes you look 5lbs slimmer. Now that is a true LESS in my book. Most importantly, once you understand how to choose a quality good fitting bra, you have a better sense of which brands fit you well and can find more economically advantageous deals both online and in the stores.

My day of corsetry indulgence occurred in early July of this year. It is now nearly mid-November and I still LOVE MY BRAS! Every time I put them on I feel special and as if I’m experiencing a luxurious treat. Most of all, I FEEL PRETTY!

What foundation pieces make you feel pretty, happy, adorned or even sexy? Where are your sources for bras? Is this an area of your life you want to explore more? Or is all this talk about lingerie too frou frou for you or just a bunch of wasteful hype?

Change Your Shoes, Create a New Wardrobe

While cruising the internet, I came across a wonderful post relaying a story of a conversation between a husband and wife. The wife is prattling on about her new shoes. Her husband expresses concern about the money spent on the indulgence. She assures him that she made a wise purchase. With her new shoes, she has created an entirely new wardrobe out of her old one, saving money since she will not need to make additional clothing purchases for the season. Sadly, I've looked and looked for this original post and cannot find it. Even worse, I can't remember which blog it was on. My sincerest apologies to the blogger who posted this story originally and please, should you come across this ever, leave me a comment so I can properly cite the information.

I found that story after indulging in the purchase above. Aren't they lovely? Sofft Corine in red. I don't know that the shoes will usurp any clothing purchases this season, but I will look smashing in those shoes. Photo courtesy of Zappos.

Why Luxury? Why Less?

I suppose it’s time to explain this blog’s title/purpose. Although I don’t expect this blog will ever be read by anyone, this is a place for me to focus on how I live life and my desire to live a balanced life that is authentic to my heart and soul. Over the past few years I have been overwhelmed by so much that life has thrown at me. It’s so easy to just allow oneself to be controlled by the circumstances and goings on of life, to react to schedules, appointments, meetings, to-do lists and allow our desires to receive attention only in the event all else is accomplished, which it rarely ever is. Hence my heart and soul have become starved for the fulfillment they (I) crave.

Five years ago I was doing quite well, living my life in a fulfilling way, managing challenges as they came along. Then a few years ago began a period of incredible stress due to a move, work challenges, and most stressful of all, a custody battle for my daughter who, because of adjustment difficulties to her father’s remarriage and moving into her stepmother’s home, was experiencing extreme stress, depression and plummeting self-esteem while living with her father and step-mother, who in addition to the stressors above, did their best to undermine my role as mother.
My first blog I began a couple years ago because I was focused on achieving balance in my life. I was successful neither with the blog nor with achieving balance. Part was due to the circumstances of life; part due to a lack of commitment on my own behalf. Now that some of those major upheavals have resolved in my life, I feel better equipped to make healthful changes towards living a soul-fulfilling life. Or perhaps I should say that it has come to my attention that it is no longer something I can put off until tomorrow.

So, why luxury? Why the heck not!?! I deserve it. Oh I don’t mean spend oodles of moolah and the best of everything. I do mean filling my life with that which I truly love whether it be foods, furnishings, past-times, etc.

Why less? Because I have little moolah to go around. Because my home is cluttered with items that I either can’t wear, don’t use, don’t like, etc. Because too much of my life is spent on meaningless time drains like tv (got rid of cable earlier this year); excessive checking of email, both work and personal; errands for things I don’t need or certainly don’t need right then, wasting time in cyberspace at places that no longer fulfill me; and because I have allowed myself to gain a substantial amount of weight (30lbs or so) due to stress, thoughtless eating, emotional eating, and increased sedentary lifestyle. So, less will be more for me.

Now comes the "how". Well you didn't think I'd give up all my plans in one post, did you? The "how" is what this blog is about, that, and the motivation to keep me moving in the direction of liberation from old less than happy ways. However I will say that I believe to be successful, simplicity will be key. Starting small and keeping it simple will, hopefully, beckon progress.

Confidence - Is it the Foundation of Luxury?

Well is it? I'm not really sure. But isn't luxury just what makes us feel good? I would argue that confidence makes people feel good about themselves. In these times, I think that alone may well be a luxury. So many of us lack self-confidence. Some of us lack it in certain areas of our lives while others lack it entirely. I think confidence is the backbone of a life of luxury. And since I want a luxurious life, I need to get me some confidence! I'm a person who has abundant confidence in some areas of my life, but it's absent in others. Regardless of whether one needs to fill a minor vacancy or a deep abyss, how does one generate this elusive state of being????

Recently some friends of mine posted a quote from their 14 year-old daughter who answered that question ever so wisely. Emma said, "People wonder how I'm so self-confident. It's because I lie to myself all the time." Brava!!!!! Dear Emma, Brava!!!!! Yes indeed it's true. When it comes to self confidence, fake it 'til you make it is the only way to go. Baby steps are required, to be sure, but once we get used to playing with confidence, taking it out for a spin now and again, the more frequently we will bring it out to play again. Before we know it, we find that we're no longer faking it; we're living it.